Saturday, December 31, 2011

The World Says Hi to 2012

One of things why I love New Year is because is something that the whole world celebrates. We are all in this together. It is a new beginning for everybody, a chance to start all over. And I love seeing the pictures of how everybody celebrates it. It shows that despite all of the bad things of this world, love and hope are always louder and stronger.

ITS 2012!!!!!!!!!!!!

So this is the first post of 2012. And what can I say? LIVE THIS YEAR LIKE IT IS REALLY THE END OF THE WORLD. It's probably bullshit, but who cares, let's take advantage. The Mayans gave us the gift of living like there is no 2013, let's enjoy it. I have so many good feelings about this year, and I am really excited now about going back and live my life, enjoy every second of it. I'm starting this year with happiness, and with optimism. This is going to be my year. I am finishing high school, I am going back to Argentina, this is the last year of being a teenager!!!!!! I am just really excited about what's coming.


Goodbye 2011

Well, I'm in the middle of dinner in my house with a bunch of people so I'm gonna take a couple of minutes to write the last post of 2011 in this blog that became my best friend during this year.

I need to say thanks to my loyal 10 followers who comment, advice me, and make me feel like I'm not alone every time I have a problem. So I really appreciate it. I know you guys all around the world so some of you are already in the future, in 2012, while I'm still stuck in 2011 for two more hours, but no matter where you are, I wish the best for this new year. I hope you all make wishes for the next 12 months, and I really hope you start them with happiness and joy.

Then I wanna say Happy New Year to my family and friends, even though they don't read this. But they all mean the world to me, thank you for being part of my life. To my family, thank you for giving me everything I needed in 2011, and to my friends, thank you for being there even though I was on the other side of the world. Thank you for showing me how much you love me, for helping me with every single stupid drama, and thank you for supporting me always.

And then I wanna say thanks to America. Thank you for having me this whole year. I hated you, I loved you, I enjoyed you, and you taught me millions of things about life that I will never forget. 2011 was definitely a strange but amazing year studying abroad in this country, and no matter how many ups and downs I have had, I will never regret anything. THANK YOU AMERICA.

And well people, I wish you the best. I have lots of good feelings about 2012, but this post is not really about the year that is coming, it is more about saying goodbye to the year that is leaving. Here's to the good memories, to the happy moments and also to the sad moments, to the laughs, to the smiles, to the broken hearts, to the tears, to the good songs, to the good and bad grades, to everything. After all, it was a good year. Every year is good, and I feel like many people said that 2011 was a hard year for everybody, even for politics, economy, and those stuff. But we can't have a rainbow without a little rain. So 2011 probably gave us the tools to start a good 2012.


Friday, December 30, 2011

Laugh At Yourself.

I have once heard a quote that is something like "laughing at your self solves all of your problems". In time I've learned that it is true. Laughing at your own mistakes instead of suffering for them is the best thing we can do in this life. And it reminded me of Sandra Bullock. One night she won worst actress at the Razzies Awards, she went there, took the award, and gave a speech. She was the only actress in Hollywood who did this along with Halle Berry. Only two, out of more than 20 actresses, went and faced it. Because sometimes we have to admit that we didn't do our best, and some other times well... we need to admit we really did suck. Are you gonna run away from criticism? Are you gonna pretend you didn't recognize it? No, just go there and learn from it, and do it better next time. Laugh about it with the rest of the people, and show them you are not scared of failure. It is always better to try and suck at it rather than never know what could have been. So I really respect Sandra Bullock for going there and just joking about it. That is one of the things I respect the most in this society where everybody wants to be better than everybody else. And you know what's the best thing? The next day, Sandra won the Academy Award for BEST ACTRESS. It is amazing how life is showing the world by this event that we learn from mistakes, and we always get better.

So just laugh at your mistakes, and improve them. The result might not come in a matter of one day like in Sandra's case, but eventually you'll realize how much you have learned.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

I had a dream with him last night. It's the third time this week, and I don't know what the hell is going on but I can't stop smiling when I think about him.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011


So today I went to the city with Steph and we went ice skating to Central Park, which was beautiful. Then we went to grab lunch to an European cafe, and then we went to downtown, to Union Square and NYU, which is the college where I would like to go in some other life haha I'm not that smart in this one. I had a lot of fun, and I love this city, it is truly magical and amazing.

Tough Christmas for the Cartels

The Sinaloa Federation has had a rough Christmas Season so far, and their 'luck' seems to have deserted them. The Mexican drug cartels take December off and usually go back to their wicked ways after the first week of January. This year has been no different. But while crime has taken a holiday, and while you've been enjoying your Christmas Season, oblivious to the 'war next door', they have been punched again and again thanks to a partnership between the Mexican Government and their allies in the United States.

Cartel Security Chief - Filipe Cabrera Sarabia (El Inge/The Engineer) was arrested in Sinaloa on Friday (almost a week ago). (link)

Cartel European Operations Chief - Luis Rodriguez Olivera was arrested in Mexico yesterday as he tried to board a commercial flight to Paris. (link)

Cartel Weapons Chief - Nicolas Balcazar Lopez (El Bronco) was arrested in Guadalajara a little over a week ago, but strangely, he was subsequently released.

Christmas in Mexico this year has a different spin on it.

Merry Christmas, Drug Cartels...

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Getting Interesting

Well, some new things happened with that guy I talked about the other day.

After I posted that, I realized that it couldn't be true, and even if it was, it was not a big deal. He was not doing anything, and I always say that if a guy likes you, he is going to make it happen. So I figured he probably just wanted to hook up and nothing else, and that I had to stop thinking about it.

Last night all of my friends had a party, including him, and my best friend talked to him about it. They were both drunk, but according to my friend, he said that he would like to have some kind of relationship with me :| (wtf). And then he had some weird statuses on facebook and bbm such as "I'll wait for you" or "your eyes don't see me", or stuff like that. I normally would think that's corny, but now I actually think it is kinda cute. And my friend keeps insisting that he really means those things.

As weird as this might feel, I'm starting to like the idea I must confess. I don't know if I would like to have a serious relationship with him, I can't even think about it when nothing has happened yet, and when he is just my friend, and when I'm so far away, and when I have a few other guys that I would like to hook up with, but he is cute, and he knows what he is doing when it comes down to girls, so maybe... just maybe... I might play along.

I was also thinking about creating a label for him in this blog, the thing is, nothing really happened yet, and once I create the label, I can't really erase it because a label means that it was part of my life, and he is not really part of anything, he is not really that important. I'm getting my hopes us, and SOME things are happening, but I don't know, I feel like it is not the right time yet to make him part of this blog. I don't even know if he's ever gonna be important enough to make it here, I mean, if a guy makes it to a label on this blog, he made it pretty far in my life, so I should let him fight for that spot a little bit more... and we'll see how far he can get.

Hey Jude - The Beatles

Hey Jude, don't make it bad
Take a sad song and make it better
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better

Hey Jude, don't be afraid
You were made to go out and get her

The minute you let her under your skin
Then you begin to make it better

And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain
Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder
Na na na, na na, na na na na

Hey Jude, don't let me down
You have found her, now go and get her
Remember to let her into your heart

Then you can start to make it better

So let it out and let it in, hey Jude, begin
You're waiting for someone to perform with
And don't you know that it's just you? Hey Jude, you'll do
The movement you need is on your shoulder
Na na na, na na, na na na na, yeah


And I think I should create a label for this guy...

2011 Thank you

Just like last year I am going to write a brief description of each month. Overall, this was an amazing year. I did feel very, very empty in some situations, I missed my friends, I missed my life, at some point I really hated many things of this new world, but after all, I could not be more grateful for having this amazing chance. I got to meet so many cool people, and now I can say that a part of me belongs to this country. 2011 taught me a lot of things, but most important, it made me feel like a part of me is American not just because my dad was born here, but because now I have a history in this country, I had my crushes, my friends, my tears, my smiles, and my memories. 20 years from now I am not going to remember the people I didn't like, the moments I wanted to go back and party with my friends, or the essays that stressed me out... I am going to remember how proud I felt of myself, of doing it until the end, of not giving up, of overachieving my goal, of having the guts to go to an american school and speak out loud with my spanish accent, of learning another history, another language, and another culture, of learning how to survive in situations I would have never imagined I could get through. I am so thankful or this year because it was the most productive year of my life, I will never forget it, and most important, I will never regret a single thing of it. Thank you 2011.

January: the year started with 2 feet of snow, it was the first time that I could actually be in my house and have that much snow outside. School was alright, chemistry was starting to get really hard, I remember I did really badly on my mid terms, but it was ok. At the same time, I had volleyball with Morgan in our gym class, and Eryn was also there, so it was kinda perfect. I also met Cody this month.

February: The first marking period ended and I started my new elective, Entrepreneurship, were I made a new friend, Julie. My gym class was also divided into two, so I couldn't be with Eryn anymore, but I ended up with some popular kids like Elsa, Terri, Allison, and Katelyn, and of course, Morgan and his soccer friends. Nothing really happened though, but not having to get dressed for gym anymore was pretty cool.

March: Lexi was born, and my grandparents came to visit! It was also my birthday and I turned 16!

April: Health ended and now we had to pick new gym classes. My whole class was going to ADT (advanced weight training) but it was only for athletes, so I had to beg Mr Cicotelli to let me go to his class, and he was really nice so he said yes. It was my favorite gym class of all times. I was in a group with Elsa and Katelyn and Morgan was there every single there lifting weight. It was S E X Y. haha.

May: and it was finally warm after the snow of April! I had a lot of fun during this month. I finally felt like I belonged in my school. I loved my Italian class, entrepreneurship was pretty cool, the weight room was fun, and the other classes kept getting better and better. The only problem was my first oral presentation in English class for 40 minutes with Mary Ellen. It was awkward and I had never been so nervous in my life. Besides, the teacher and the other kids didn't make me feel better at all. But I got through it and it was alright.

June: It started with Kristin's Sweet 16 where I just had a lot of fun and I met thousands of people from my school. Then came Puerto Rico, where I fell in love with a stranger, dear Morocho. Then I came back, I had the finals, where I didn't really do that well, and then school was over. It felt kinda sad to finish school, because I was just starting to love it, but there was nothing I could do about it.

July: by far the worst month. My dad was upset with me because I didn't find a job so I didn't have my computer and I was basically in my house all day doing nothing. Just getting tan and going to the gym. Morgan started dating someone, so it was the month where I lost my chances with him, if I ever had chances. Argentina also lost the Copa America, which was S A D.

August: I got my computer back! This was the last time I talked to Jake, he asked me for my BB pin and told me to talk to him sometime and I never did, and then he never talked to me again. Nothing really interested happened, but I got my schedule for my Junior year, and I traveled to Cape May.

September: Junior year started, new classes, new classmates, new teachers, new everything. But the only thing that was not new, it was me and it felt awesome. This is the month where I met Sam and I had on a crush on him, which didn't really last that long. I really felt like I finally was part of that school, even if I had to walk those hallways alone. I also had my second oral presentation for history, and I was wreck of how nervous I was.

October & November: Nothing really happened, but it was an amazing month. I got an A+ for the first time ever on my essay, which was pretty cool. Even if nothing interesting happened, it was a good month, I just enjoyed every single day of my last months in America.

December: Well, the countdown begun. There were some issued with my parents, but I did not let that ruined my perfect year. It was a bittersweet month, I couldn't really believe I had only a month left. This was the month were I lost the bus like once a week, and it became traumatic for me because my dad would get pretty upset, but at the end of the day, it was funny. I started volleyball with my gym class, and I loved it! Not just because playing volleyball was fun, but also because I loved this class. Only 16 kids, any of them were popular athletes, which made it less awkward or intimidating, and they were all nice people. Then I found out about that kid in Argentina who likes me, and who knows, maybe something interesting might end up happening with hi, so far it is not important, but maybe in a couple of months it is going to be a big deal.

And that was my year. Maybe each month alone was not that important, but the year as a whole was amazing. I've grown like I had never grown before in my life.

Bucket List: Write A Book

In of the things that I have to do before I die is write a book, and in fact, I have just started one because one of my Christmas gifts was Microsoft Word, which I had been waiting for for quite a while so I could start writing my story. It is called Juliette and it kinda shows my love, admiration, and passion for Europe, I'm not going to say which city, but you should be able to guess it by the name of the book. The story combines some things that happened to me, some of my dreams, my fears, my plans, and some other things that I loved about other movies or books. I am not writer, but I love writing, so I don't know if I'm gonna write the whole thing at the same time, or if I am going to just write the chapter without an order, for example, the other day while I was trying to sleep I imagined in my head the perfect ending, and I actually had the right words to write it then, but I didn't have the computer and I had to wake up early the next morning so I just fell asleep. But next time the same thing happens, I will just start writing, and then when I have all of those parts, I'll put them together and finish my book. I don't think it is going to be good enough to actually do something with it, but at least I wanna create something that nobody else can create, because that book if it is going to be made by, like I said, things that I like, things that I want to express, and it is going to be pure art.

I don't know if I'm going to post some parts of it or not, but I will definitely post about how I am doing with the book and about my new ideas.

Someday I am going to be able to put a check on this item of my bucket list.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Christmas 2011


So I kinda need to talk about some things....

Apparently there is a new guy, but I'm not gonna give him a nickname or a label or anything because he is not that important at all. It all started with my best friend telling me that there was a guy interested in me back in Argentina, considering the fact that I'm going back in 29 days... She told me he is really close to her, that he is like a brother or something. She has a few guy friends that are like brothers to her so that wasn't a big clue. In that moment I remembered the fact that the day before, one of those guy friends talked to me randomly on BBM but I didn't really care because I would never expect him to be interested in me, I've known him for a while so why would he be wanna hook up or something now? Besides, he is the kind of hot popular guy (out of my league). So anyway, we kept talking, and she kept giving me clues. At the beginning I thought she was talking about a really ugly guy, but deep inside, I was second guessing about the guy that talked to me the day before. And then she said he plays rugby and he was in a serious relationship before but they broke up. And that was just too obvious, it was definitely the guy. It felt so weird because like I said, I would have never expected him to like ME. The thing is, he doesn't like me. He probably wants to hook up and nothing else. He is really mature and stuff, but he dated a girl for like 3 years so he probably just wants to be a player, which is why I don't care about the situation. Even if it feels weird, I think I would hook up with him too, I mean he is really hot. So I think we might want the same thing.

Of course, it didn't really take long for me to get kinda obsessed with it. I don't know why, I don't like him, and he is just my friend, I never thought of him in a different way, so to be honest I don't like HIM, I just like the idea of HIM. Because he is one of the closet guys that could be the perfect guy. He is not perfect, he is just CLOSE to being the stereotypical perfect boyfriend. That doesn't mean he is perfect for me though.

So I am trying to calm down about it and just let it be and let it flow. Whatever will be will be. But something deep inside myself keeps telling me how funny life can be sometimes... because somehow, life always throws at me better things than the ones I was expecting. So yeah, sometimes you need to stop fighting so hard for what you want, and lay back for a while and just trust fate and the beautiful surprises of life. And that's the greatest thing about the whole situation: I don't care about him, I just care about how everything turned out after Morgan, Cody, Sam, etc, etc. Like I always say, the unexpected always takes our breath away.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas dear readers! I hope you all have a wonderful and safe day with the people you love, and I hope you get all of the gifts you were expecting. But most important, I hope you all enjoy and understand the truth meaning of Christmas. Doesn't matter what you believe in, just say thanks to that guy who was born 2011 years ago who saved us, just do it. Maybe he is just a myth, maybe he was real, I don't have the answers, but at the end of the day, if he was really the Son of God, why would you let the chance of saying happy birthday go? So Happy Birthday Jesus!

My gifts were Microsoft Office for Macbook, the Harry Potter Movie Collection, the recipes of my stepmom to take to Argentina, and AND HD FILM CAMERA! Let the director begin!


Christmas Greetings

Peace on Earth

The season conjures up memories of holidays past, of the present, and hopes of future joy with family and friends. Irrespective of your faith or system of religion (or lack thereof), the concept of a time when peace is celebrated and family values are practiced is something to be sought after. 

It has nothing to do with spending money in packed shopping malls and everything to do with what is important. Not everything that counts can be counted - not everything that can be counted, counts. There is a higher standard of living and it has to do with sharing love and fellowship.  At Christmas, we seem to put aside some of the pettyness of routine life (I said some, not all) as people and to think about those who matter to us in our lives. At least that is the ideal. I hope that you all have an ideal Christmas.

Good will to everyone, everywhere.

However, for those of you who are not Christians...and on the lighter side...

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Sunday, December 18, 2011

It's hard to wait around for something that might never happen. But it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you want.

English & Spanish

I've realized how being bilingual affects my personality. The other day I was in Spanish class speaking in English with my friends, and some other kid that was not in the conversation asked me something in Spanish so I replied in Spanish, and one of my friends said that my energy completely changed when I switched to the other language. That surprised me, because I didn't know that, and I started to pay attention to it, and yes, it is true. I finally understood why I always rather act in English, or write in English, or have conversations about life in English, and why I use Spanish for real things, such as conversations about the things that are going on in the world, when I need to speak in public, or when I need a friend.

Spanish is my first language, so it represents a part of me that is real, a part of me that everybody can see, and a part of me that I have already figured out. At the same time, it represents my roots, so when I need to talk about a problem, I would prefer talking to my friends in Argentina, in Spanish. And then English is a language that I didn't just learn after living in the States for a year. I've also learned it through movies, books, music, and blogs, in other words, English represents the Art in my life. When I'm speaking Spanish, I can't get all corny and cheesy because I am not that kind of person, or at least I wasn't when I was living in Argentina, and it doesn't feel right. I also can't try to act because I can't be somebody else when I am speaking with that Argentinian accent that every single person from South America can recognize and that represents who I've been since the day I was born. But in English I can open up myself and be whoever I want to be, and use words like "passion", "romance", "being in love", without feeling awkward and uncomfortable, because I am still trying to build the person I wanna be in this country. The Lola that orders pizza in English, the Lola that says Hi to her friends everyday at school... that Lola was not born on March 31st of 1995. It is up to me to create that person according to who I want to be, what I want to do, and where I want to be. So in English I can put myself out there and express my feelings easier, because I feel like a whole new person. I can be artistic, and I can dream all I want, while in Spanish I have my feet on the ground and I am a little bit colder.

I love the fact that I have the ability not just of speaking two languages and experiencing two different cultures, but the fact that I shape myself according to where I am and to the things I've been through in that place.

And if you ever wondered, that's the reason why even though I am from Argentina, this blog is written in English. Believe me, in Spanish I wouldn't be able to talk about certain things. I would actually blame the Mexican and Venezuelan sitcoms for making some Spanish words so cheesy every time they talk about love or stuff like that, I don't know. But the point is that there's a lot of myself that people have to discover in order to get to know me 100%. In fact, there's a lot of myself left that I still have to figure out. 

Midnight In Paris

"I can never decide whether Paris is more beautiful by day or by night. No, you can't, you couldn't pick one. I mean I can give you a checkmate argument for each side. You know, I sometimes think, how is anyone ever gonna come up with a book, or a painting, or a symphony, or a sculpture that can compete with a great city. You can't. Because you look around and every street, every boulevard, is its own special art form and when you think that in the cold, violent, meaningless universe that Paris exists, these lights, I mean come on, there's nothing happening on Jupiter or Neptune, but from way out in space you can see these lights, the cafes, people drinking and singing. For all we know, Paris is the hottest spot in the universe"

What an amazing movie. It is about this guy, Gil (Owen Wilson), who discovers the magic of Paris after midnight. The movie revolves about him going back to the 20's and meeting inspirational people such as Hemingway and Fitzgerald and Picasso, but I think that the main focus of the story is the beauty of Paris. I can't describe how it makes you feel towards this city, I just fell in love with it. This is why I am not going to talk about the story line, but about the pearl of the world, which without a doubt, is the french capital.

There are a lot of beautiful cities in the world... I've been to some of them like NYC, LA, Madrid, Buenos Aires, Athens, etc, and then there are some other cities that are in my list of places to go before I die, like Rome, London, Berlin, Milan, Venice, and of course, Paris. For some reason, I feel an attraction to this place. Every time I see pictures, or videos, or movies about it I feel a strong connection, and I NEED to go there. Maybe everybody feels that way, just because it Paris and it is supposed to be beautiful and adorable and magic, but I can't stop dreaming about taking a flight there all by myself, stay at a cheap french apartment, wear a nice french dress, and just walk, like Gil does in this movie. Discover every single corner of this beautiful city; learn to draw just by looking at the beautiful details of every single bridge, building, house, and statue; take professional pictures of the Eiffel Tower; have a creme brulee at a small french cafe; listen to the beauty and grace of the french accent; stare at the amazing paintings of the Musée du Louvre for hours; write about each single thing I see and learn to come up with a book about french romance... and million of other things. Basically, I just want to literally WALK AROUND PARIS for hours, which is why it didn't take me long to feel interested about this movie, because I understand the passion of this character towards this city.

The good thing about myself, is that when I want something, I end up doing it, no matter how hard it is. I dreamed about Los Angeles and Hollywood, and life gave the chance to go. I dreamed about moving to the states, and I did it. And each place gave me something that I'll keep for the rest of my life. Like I am a big puzzle and each city of my places to go before I die is a new piece that completes my puzzle. And I think that Paris is next. I know it is not going to be soon because I have to be old enough to do all of the things that I want to do, and I might have to go though college first, but all I know is that someday I'll make it there, and I will discover a whole new part of myself that I didn't know I had. I want to go there and grow as an artist, just like I grew in New Jersey as a person. I wanna fall in love with the art of Paris, with its architecture, culture, history, details, music, food, language, everything.

The thing with the movie is as far as I know, Paris is not just magical at midnight... it is magical all day long. And I hope I will be able to see that for myself sometime in my life.