New Year's Eve - Pictures

Goodbye 2011

Well, I'm in the middle of dinner in my house with a bunch of people so I'm gonna take a couple of minutes to write the last post of 2011 in this blog that became my best friend during this year.

I need to say thanks to my loyal 10 followers who comment, advice me, and make me feel like I'm not alone every time I have a problem. So I really appreciate it. I know you guys all around the world so some of you are already in the future, in 2012, while I'm still stuck in 2011 for two more hours, but no matter where you are, I wish the best for this new year. I hope you all make wishes for the next 12 months, and I really hope you start them with happiness and joy.

Then I wanna say Happy New Year to my family and friends, even though they don't read this. But they all mean the world to me, thank you for being part of my life. To my family, thank you for giving me everything I needed in 2011, and to my friends, thank you for being there even though I was on the other side of the world. Thank you for showing me how much you love me, for helping me with every single stupid drama, and thank you for supporting me always.

And then I wanna say thanks to America. Thank you for having me this whole year. I hated you, I loved you, I enjoyed you, and you taught me millions of things about life that I will never forget. 2011 was definitely a strange but amazing year studying abroad in this country, and no matter how many ups and downs I have had, I will never regret anything. THANK YOU AMERICA.

And well people, I wish you the best. I have lots of good feelings about 2012, but this post is not really about the year that is coming, it is more about saying goodbye to the year that is leaving. Here's to the good memories, to the happy moments and also to the sad moments, to the laughs, to the smiles, to the broken hearts, to the tears, to the good songs, to the good and bad grades, to everything. After all, it was a good year. Every year is good, and I feel like many people said that 2011 was a hard year for everybody, even for politics, economy, and those stuff. But we can't have a rainbow without a little rain. So 2011 probably gave us the tools to start a good 2012.

GOODBYE 2011. HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!

2011 Thank you

Just like last year I am going to write a brief description of each month. Overall, this was an amazing year. I did feel very, very empty in some situations, I missed my friends, I missed my life, at some point I really hated many things of this new world, but after all, I could not be more grateful for having this amazing chance. I got to meet so many cool people, and now I can say that a part of me belongs to this country. 2011 taught me a lot of things, but most important, it made me feel like a part of me is American not just because my dad was born here, but because now I have a history in this country, I had my crushes, my friends, my tears, my smiles, and my memories. 20 years from now I am not going to remember the people I didn't like, the moments I wanted to go back and party with my friends, or the essays that stressed me out... I am going to remember how proud I felt of myself, of doing it until the end, of not giving up, of overachieving my goal, of having the guts to go to an american school and speak out loud with my spanish accent, of learning another history, another language, and another culture, of learning how to survive in situations I would have never imagined I could get through. I am so thankful or this year because it was the most productive year of my life, I will never forget it, and most important, I will never regret a single thing of it. Thank you 2011.

January: the year started with 2 feet of snow, it was the first time that I could actually be in my house and have that much snow outside. School was alright, chemistry was starting to get really hard, I remember I did really badly on my mid terms, but it was ok. At the same time, I had volleyball with Morgan in our gym class, and Eryn was also there, so it was kinda perfect. I also met Cody this month.

February: The first marking period ended and I started my new elective, Entrepreneurship, were I made a new friend, Julie. My gym class was also divided into two, so I couldn't be with Eryn anymore, but I ended up with some popular kids like Elsa, Terri, Allison, and Katelyn, and of course, Morgan and his soccer friends. Nothing really happened though, but not having to get dressed for gym anymore was pretty cool.

March: Lexi was born, and my grandparents came to visit! It was also my birthday and I turned 16!

April: Health ended and now we had to pick new gym classes. My whole class was going to ADT (advanced weight training) but it was only for athletes, so I had to beg Mr Cicotelli to let me go to his class, and he was really nice so he said yes. It was my favorite gym class of all times. I was in a group with Elsa and Katelyn and Morgan was there every single there lifting weight. It was S E X Y. haha.

May: and it was finally warm after the snow of April! I had a lot of fun during this month. I finally felt like I belonged in my school. I loved my Italian class, entrepreneurship was pretty cool, the weight room was fun, and the other classes kept getting better and better. The only problem was my first oral presentation in English class for 40 minutes with Mary Ellen. It was awkward and I had never been so nervous in my life. Besides, the teacher and the other kids didn't make me feel better at all. But I got through it and it was alright.

June: It started with Kristin's Sweet 16 where I just had a lot of fun and I met thousands of people from my school. Then came Puerto Rico, where I fell in love with a stranger, dear Morocho. Then I came back, I had the finals, where I didn't really do that well, and then school was over. It felt kinda sad to finish school, because I was just starting to love it, but there was nothing I could do about it.



July: by far the worst month. My dad was upset with me because I didn't find a job so I didn't have my computer and I was basically in my house all day doing nothing. Just getting tan and going to the gym. Morgan started dating someone, so it was the month where I lost my chances with him, if I ever had chances. Argentina also lost the Copa America, which was S A D.

August: I got my computer back! This was the last time I talked to Jake, he asked me for my BB pin and told me to talk to him sometime and I never did, and then he never talked to me again. Nothing really interested happened, but I got my schedule for my Junior year, and I traveled to Cape May.

September: Junior year started, new classes, new classmates, new teachers, new everything. But the only thing that was not new, it was me and it felt awesome. This is the month where I met Sam and I had on a crush on him, which didn't really last that long. I really felt like I finally was part of that school, even if I had to walk those hallways alone. I also had my second oral presentation for history, and I was wreck of how nervous I was.

October & November: Nothing really happened, but it was an amazing month. I got an A+ for the first time ever on my essay, which was pretty cool. Even if nothing interesting happened, it was a good month, I just enjoyed every single day of my last months in America.

December: Well, the countdown begun. There were some issued with my parents, but I did not let that ruined my perfect year. It was a bittersweet month, I couldn't really believe I had only a month left. This was the month were I lost the bus like once a week, and it became traumatic for me because my dad would get pretty upset, but at the end of the day, it was funny. I started volleyball with my gym class, and I loved it! Not just because playing volleyball was fun, but also because I loved this class. Only 16 kids, any of them were popular athletes, which made it less awkward or intimidating, and they were all nice people. Then I found out about that kid in Argentina who likes me, and who knows, maybe something interesting might end up happening with hi, so far it is not important, but maybe in a couple of months it is going to be a big deal.

And that was my year. Maybe each month alone was not that important, but the year as a whole was amazing. I've grown like I had never grown before in my life.

Christmas 2011

Thank You 2011

ASTRONOMY DISCOVERIES IN 2011.

(click on the lick above to read the article)

WOW

Waterfall of Feelings

So this is it. I have the ticket to go back to Argentina on January 25th. It feels like a waterfall. Like thousands of emotions are coming out of nowhere. But there is no turning back, now the decision is made, and I gotta deal with it, because I made it, and I know that even though I never understood why I made it, there's a reason for it. I know that God or destiny or whatever decided to put that thought in my head, to make that decision, and to see what happens next. But what people don't understand is that just because we had the freedom of choosing, doesn't mean that it is going to be easy to pick one option and move on. Sometimes, having our own future in our hands, is way harder than letting someone else decide for you.

People can't understand how it feels either. My friends tell me that I'm being dramatic, and I am not going to talk about this with my family because they are going to think I'm just being bipolar. I always bothered everybody saying that I wanted to live in the States, and when I finally came here, I also bothered everyone saying that I was missing Argentina and that I wanted to go back. But there's something that I want to make clear: just because I'm sad about it, just because I don't see Argentina as I used to see it when I came here, does not mean that I am hesitating, or that I'm thinking about staying. No. I made my decision, and I'm going to stick to it, like I said thousands of times. But obviously any of my friends had to make a decision like this one in their lives, in fact, they have no idea what this whole experience is about, so how can I expect them to understand how I feel? I can't tell them that when you have to pick between two things that you love, just because you chose only one, doesn't mean that you are not going to miss the other one, or that you love the other one a little bit less. No. It just means that you had to be strong enough to let the other option go, and that it hurts like an open-heart surgery without anesthesia.

I'm going to back, and it is going to feel like nothing happened; like it was just a dream. And I'm going to feel as lonely as I felt when I came here, when I didn't know anybody and when I had no friends. I am not saying their lives are not interesting or whatever, but they did what every single teenager does in Argentina. Yeah, they had fun experiences with each other, but that's nowhere near compared to living almost on your own in a complete different country, with a different culture, different language, different people... And I feel like I'm going to go back and everything is going to feel empty, because the adventure is going to be over. An adventure that I am not even going to be able to describe. And I'm scared that as time goes by, this experience will start to fade away, and feel more distant in the past. And who am I going to talk to?

I became a different person in a whole new environment. Now I have to go back and face my past, the people, the places, the moments, the memories... everything that I left behind. The thing is, I am different. I am not the 15-year-old girl who had no idea about the world or about real life. I grew up in different conditions, and while everything in my life was exciting for a year and a half, on January 25th, everything is going back to normal. Everything is going to be the same. The same teachers. The same places to hang out. The same stories to tell. And the same people, because yeah, they grew up in this past year too, but like I said, in a different environment. It is impossible to compare what I went through with what my friends went through in Argentina. I was trying to talk to one of my best friends today and she was stressed out about finals (in Argentina is the end of the year), so she didn't wanna talk and said that she had enough with I don't know which subject. Yes. My friends' biggest problems are studying for a final. I wish my life was that simple too. I'm starting to think how I'm going to do to say goodbye to my sisters, to my dad, to my step-mom, to my school, to my friends, to my house, to my routine, to my teachers... and they are worried because of one exam. And that's what scares me the most: going back and feeling like I wanna punch everybody in the face because of how dramatic they can be over small stuff. But again, I can't expect them to understand. Just like I am not going to understand some other issues that they had to go through while I was here (which in fact, as far as I know, are pretty simple issues too, lucky them). So in conclusion, the problem with this whole amazing experience of going to another country for a year, is that it kinda separated me from other people. Because now I'm obviously not just Argentinian, now I can feel my American blood going through my veins (my dad is American), which I never could. Now I am not going to be the person my friends used to love, and I am also going to see them in a different perspective. Just like it is gonna happen with everything, not just the people.

I know real friendship goes through it all. I know that no matter how hard it can get, we always survive. I know that everything happens for a reason. I know that whatever is meant to be will work out perfectly. I know that nothing lasts forever, so eventually I was going to have to say goodbye to America, just like I said to Argentina once. I know that when the going gets tough, the tough gets going. And I also know that nobody can't take your experiences and memories away from you, and as long as your hold them tight, not even time; in Argentinian words would be "Nadie te quita lo bailado". So by knowing all of these things, the final thing I know is that I'm going to be just fine. It is hard to see the positive side, and when you are really sad, you don't even wanna see it because you need to take all of the pain away from you, and sometimes the only thing that the positive side does is hide the pain away, making it bigger and bigger. So even though I know there's a possitive side, maybe all I need is to let my doubts and fears go.

But there's something that I promised myself before I made my decision about staying or going back. When I came to the States, I was weak. I admit it. I was the weakest person ever, and it took me a while to put some strength together. After that, I knew I was going to have to go through the same thing again, because no matter what I chose, it was gonna be hard to give the other option up. So I said: "Next time I'll be braver. I'll be my own savior" (Adele). And I promised to myself I was not going to cry myself to sleep every night, wondering what could have happened if I picked the other choice. I promised that I was going to deal with it, and be mature, and understand that just because I cannot connect the dots right now, doesn't mean that I wont be able to do it in the future. I promised I was gonna learn from this, and remember this for the rest of my life. And that's what I will do. So I'll cry for a few minutes whenever I need to, because it is ok to fall sometimes, but I'll get back up again, and be a skyscraper like Demi Lovato, and cope with it. Enjoy every minute of these two months that I have left, and no matter how much it hurts to go back, say Hello to Argentina with my heart open. Because I can waste time complaining and being worried about everything, but the truth is that we only live once, and we don't know when this beautiful life is going to end, so why bother crying and being sad? As long as we BELIEVE, and have faith, everything is going to be alright.

At the end of the day you gotta ask yourself "Was it worth it?", and I'm sure that you are going to say "HELL YEAH", even if you cried for months, even if it was the strongest pain ever, because behind every single wound, there's a good story to tell. You get your heart broken after loving with all your soul. You break your leg after giving everything in you for a soccer game. You lose your voice after screaming for hours during a concert. You spend hours studying  for the pleasure of getting a good grade. And that's what life is about, as far as I'm concern. Every good thing brings a bad thing, just like every bad thing also brings a good thing.

Happy Halloween!

Snow In October?!

Well, I don't know if this is Global Warming or what, but it is freaking snowing in October. It is gonna be a white Halloween. How weird is that?! I don't know where the fall went. I don't even know what happened with October. It went by so fast! It feels like a couple of weeks ago it was first day of school, and now it looks like Christmas and Thanks Giving! This is making me realize that in a blink of an eye, I'm gonna be getting on my plane back to Argentina. And it feels sad...

You Gotta Love The Fall I

RIP STEVE JOBS

Watching The Emmys

I know I'll be there someday, as an actress, as a director, or as a producer...